Something has shifted between you and your partner, and you can feel it. Maybe the conversations that once flowed easily have become guarded or tense. Maybe conflict has become a revolving door, the same arguments cycling through without resolution. Perhaps you’ve stopped fighting altogether, but the silence between you feels heavier than any words.
Or maybe a specific event has shaken the foundation of what you thought was solid: a betrayal, a loss, a life transition. Whatever brought you here, the fact that you’re looking for help speaks to something important. There is still a part of you that believes this relationship is worth fighting for. Here in Manassas, VA, I specialize in helping couples reconnect, rebuild trust, and create the relationship they truly want.
Ready to work on your relationship? Call (571) 229-3418 or book your first session.
What is Couples Therapy?
Couples therapy is a specialized form of psychotherapy designed to help two people in a relationship improve their communication, resolve conflicts, deepen their connection, and work through the challenges that every partnership inevitably faces. It provides a structured, safe space where both partners can be heard, where difficult truths can be spoken, and where new patterns can take root.
What many people don’t realize is that not all couples therapy is the same. Traditional approaches often focus heavily on communication skills, teaching partners to use “I” statements or practice active listening. While these tools have value, they frequently don’t reach the underlying dynamics driving the disconnection. When you’re flooded with emotion in the middle of a conflict, even the best communication technique can go out the window.
That is why I use a different approach: one rooted in Internal Family Systems (IFS) and specifically the IFIO model (Intimacy from the Inside Out). IFIO was developed by Toni Herbine-Blank and colleagues to apply IFS principles directly to couples work. Rather than simply teaching you how to talk to each other differently, IFIO helps you understand what is happening inside each of you during moments of connection and disconnection. This creates change that is more authentic and more lasting.
Couples therapy is not just for relationships in crisis. Many couples seek therapy to strengthen an already good relationship, work through a life transition like becoming parents or blending families, or simply to grow closer. Whatever your starting point, there is room for something more.
Signs Your Relationship May Benefit from Couples Therapy
Every relationship goes through difficult periods, but certain patterns suggest that professional support could make a real difference. Consider couples therapy if you notice:
- Recurring arguments that never fully resolve; you find yourselves having the same fight in different forms
- Communication breakdown, where conversations feel guarded, defensive, or like you’re speaking different languages
- Emotional distance: you feel more like roommates than partners, or one of you has pulled away
- Trust has been damaged through infidelity, dishonesty, or broken promises
- Intimacy has declined, and physical or emotional closeness feels strained or absent
- Life transitions are creating stress: a new baby, job change, relocation, blending families, or retirement
- Contempt or criticism has crept into how you speak to each other
- One or both partners are considering separation but aren’t sure it’s the right choice
- Individual struggles like depression, anxiety, or past trauma are spilling into the relationship
- You feel unheard, unseen, or undervalued by your partner
None of these patterns mean your relationship is broken beyond repair. They mean your relationship is asking for attention, and that attention, guided by the right professional, can make a real difference.
How IFS and IFIO Help Couples
The IFS model understands that each person has an internal system of “parts,” different aspects of the personality that carry different feelings, beliefs, and roles. Some parts are protective, stepping in to guard against pain. Others carry wounds from the past: old hurts, fears of abandonment, shame. In a relationship, these parts interact with your partner’s parts, often in ways neither of you fully understands.
Here is a common example: one partner feels hurt and a protective part responds with criticism. The other partner’s protective part responds to that criticism by shutting down and withdrawing. The first partner’s hurt part then feels even more abandoned, and the criticism intensifies. This cycle, often called a “pursuer-withdrawer” pattern, can go on for years, with both partners feeling misunderstood and alone.
IFIO brings awareness to these internal dynamics. In our sessions, I help each of you slow down and notice what is happening inside: which parts are getting activated, what they are feeling, and what they need. When you can speak from a place of vulnerability rather than from a triggered protective part, your partner can actually hear you. And when your partner does the same, you can hear them.
This process creates genuine empathy. Not the forced kind where you repeat back your partner’s words, but the real kind where you feel what it’s like to be in your partner’s experience. Couples often describe IFIO work as a revelation: for the first time, they understand not just what their partner does that upsets them, but why, and they feel understanding instead of resentment.
IFIO also helps each partner develop a stronger relationship with their own internal system, which naturally improves the relationship. When you can meet your own triggered parts with curiosity and compassion instead of being overwhelmed by them, you show up differently in your partnership. You become less reactive, more present, and more capable of genuine intimacy.
The goal isn’t to eliminate conflict. Some disagreement is healthy and natural. The goal is to change how you move through conflict, so that it becomes an opportunity for greater understanding rather than a source of damage.
My Approach to Couples Therapy
As an IFIO-trained therapist and Certified IFS Therapist with Level 2 IFS training, I bring a specialized skill set to couples work that goes beyond conventional relationship counseling. My training in IFIO (Intimacy from the Inside Out) means I am equipped to work with the internal dynamics of both individuals while simultaneously attending to the relationship system as a whole.
In our first session together, I meet with both of you to hear each partner’s perspective on the relationship: what’s working, what’s not, and what you hope for. I pay close attention not just to what you say but to how your internal parts are showing up in the room. This gives me a map of the relational dynamics we’ll be working with.
From there, sessions typically involve a blend of dialogue between partners, individual “parts work” done in the presence of the other partner, and psychoeducation about how internal systems interact in relationships. I might help one partner speak directly to a hurt part while the other partner witnesses and listens. These moments of vulnerability and witnessing are often where the most significant shifts happen.
My style is warm, steady, and balanced. I am not going to take sides or tell you who is “right.” I am going to help both of you feel understood and guide you toward the kind of connection you’re longing for. With a Master’s in Clinical Psychology from Towson University and over 19 years of clinical experience, I’ve worked with couples dealing with every kind of challenge, from everyday disconnection to infidelity to the aftermath of domestic violence. You can learn more about my training and background.
For couples who wish to integrate their faith into our work, I also offer Christian counseling that honors spiritual values alongside clinical excellence.
What to Expect in Sessions
Couples therapy sessions are 50 minutes long and are available both in-person at my Manassas, VA office and via telehealth throughout Virginia and Florida. Many couples find that weekly sessions provide the consistency needed for real progress, especially in the early stages. As you grow and your relationship stabilizes, we may transition to biweekly sessions.
In a typical session, I create a space where both partners feel safe enough to be honest. We might begin by checking in about the week: what went well, what was difficult, and what came up between sessions. From there, we’ll work with whatever feels most alive and important, often focusing on a recent interaction that triggered strong emotions.
I’ll guide you through the process of slowing down, turning inward, and identifying which parts are active. Then I’ll help you speak from a more centered, vulnerable place, and help your partner truly hear you. Over time, you’ll internalize this process and begin doing it naturally outside of sessions.
My fee is $215 per session, and I accept Blue Cross Blue Shield insurance. I offer an initial consultation so you can get a sense of whether my approach feels like the right fit for your relationship.
Why Couples Choose My Practice
Finding the right couples therapist matters. The quality of the therapeutic relationship, and the therapist’s skill, directly impacts outcomes. Here is what I bring to this work:
- IFIO training: I am specifically trained in Intimacy from the Inside Out, the gold standard for applying IFS to couples work. This means I don’t just understand IFS theory; I know how to work with the complex dynamics that emerge when two internal systems interact in a relationship.
- Certified IFS Therapist: My IFS certification, with Level 2 training completed, reflects advanced proficiency in the IFS model. This depth of training allows me to work skillfully with the parts that show up in couples sessions.
- 19+ years of clinical experience: I have walked alongside hundreds of couples through conflict, disconnection, betrayal, and rebuilding. This experience gives me a steady, grounded presence even when sessions get emotionally intense.
- Whole-person care: I see each partner as a complete person with their own history, wounds, strengths, and inner wisdom. I honor the complexity of what each of you brings to the relationship.
Your relationship deserves real attention. Schedule a consultation or call (571) 229-3418 to get started.